travel2japan: letter I wrote to myself before my departure
This is a letter, I wrote in a separate book at the day before my departure to Japan, so at the 20th of March. It contains my expectations, hopes, worries and thoughts about my upcoming adventure Japan.
comments in italics
I got this cute book from my friends as a farewell and now I want to write something in it as well. I already got recommended to write a letter to myself about what I expect the exchange to be like. So I will do now.
I think it is going to be difficult. I think I should have thought more closely about things instead of delaying it till the very end. I think I will get along with my host family. But soon, they will complain about my bad Japanese and expect me to study harder. My host mother will want to know a lot about what I am doing and my host father will want to decide a lot of things about me.(I just transferred the image of my own parents to my host parents, I think) I will have very little space to decide things on my own. In the first time, I will follow their instructions, but this will get harder as I want to do fun things in my exchange. This will lead to a conflict between my personality and obedience. (This is almost the opposite from how it really was like. Rather did I study so much, that my host parents worried about me. I could decide a lot of things myself and I especially at the beginning, I tried to make as less decisions myself as possible what then led to small conflicts. I was following any instruction, but this was not difficult or challenging at all.)
The school will be big and complex. I will have difficulties orientate myself and not a lot of people will offer help, also because people will barely understand my Japanese. I will understand little in lessons and will be hardly able to participate or take notes. (Wrong again. Any person I met offered me help and everybody tried to help me solving my problems despite of the language barrier.)
My Japanese teacher will ask me, why I went to Japan in the first place, since my Japanese is so bad.
At first, I will be a popularity in school but by the time, I will become an outsider, because I am so self-conscious. I will spend little time with people from my school. (I kind of stayed a popularity in school although it decreased a little by the time. But as you will see in the progress of my diary, I made a bunch of friends and spend a lot of time with them. Of course, I always was kind of an outsider all the time.)
I will join a club but somehow feel frightened, anxious and uncomfortable there. (Partly true. I did not feel uncomfortable in the club. At first, I was a bit tired because of it but soon, I got to really love my club and its people)
I will be busy especially studying Japanese. So, some hours of sleep will have to bite the dust. (Completely true.)
I will have difficulties with my biological parents, because I need so much money and do not really get enough money to buy the things I need. My father will say that I am not able to handle money, even though I am not indulging myself in anything. I will probably write long apology letters. (Not really. Actually, my father wrote me and e- mail after about one month saying that I may spend a lot more money to have fun in Japan. To be honest, I had a really good relationship with my parents when I was in Japan)
My counselor here will question my adaptabilityand Japanese ability more and more. (Also my counselor asked me to spend less time studying Japanese and praised my language ability at various occasions)
A lot of people will tell me to adapt and study more. I will maybe cry a lot. (Although I really cried a lot, it was not the case that people told me any of these things.)
But I still will learn and explore a lot of things. (Yes, one hundred percent true!)
And in the end, I will be glad to have managed everything and to come home. (Although I am happy being home I was not at the time when I came home from Japan. At this time, all I could feel was sadness and the desperate wish to come back to Japan as soon as possible.)
I will pass JLPT N4 by the skin of one's teeth. (That is true.)
It will likely be this way. (So, as you could see I barely predicted anything right. I thought my exchange to be way more difficult and not funny that it actually was. And I extremely exageratively worried about my Japanese. I should have studied a little more Japanese before departure, yes, but it was not too dificult to learn the language in Japan)
I hope you enjoyed my thoughts and I will see you soon,